Self-Control (Day 10 of 60)

A lot of it is about self-denial. Ever since college, I’ve struggled with my own self-denial. I had an epiphany one day through no design of my own. After offending a friend, another friend helped me realize that my over-zealousness and personal ideals framed by a closed mindset and unloving approach born from my own sense of pride in self led to my offensive behavior and thinking.

Surely that was a bit obtuse. To say it more clearly, I thought I had everything figured out which was evidenced by my own values and will-power when reality was quite different. Reality is that love trumps all. Since then, I’ve been very relaxed in my approach to many things in life. Sometimes, I’ve been too relaxed. In truth, I rebelled from my own “self-denial”. It has taken me a score of years to get back to a personal place of self-control where I am able (albeit not necessarily happily) to deny myself a very basic desire – eating – to achieve a goal (healthy living). I don’t think I’m rebirthing those pride issues. Over the last decade especially I’ve had many a humbling moment.

The beauty of it all is that it seems as though God has brought me to a place of healing and strengthening. I know life is never “easy” and many trials and complications await – that’s the nature of life. For the moment, I believe God is providing balm, and I am unspeakably thankful.

Well, the juicing is part of this whole process. I’m slowly wiping away nearly two decades of poor physical management. In college, I did pretty well with maintaining my weight, but once I left and got a desk job, the tonnage began to coalesce. After marriage and kids, the fat did not stop. It actually increased more rapidly. Perhaps the stress of six children and a wife with a low income has caused a bit of that stress. I think that many other factors were more involved in making the stress.

Regardless, here I am now, working on getting rid of the physical reminders of the stressful past and looking joyously forward to a bright future.

Juices today:
Standard Morning Juice
Apples (3)
Orange (1)
Lime (1)
Yum.

Spinach Lunch Juice
Spinach (4 handfuls)
Carrots (2)
Celery (2 stalks)
Apples (2)
Lemon (1)
It was alright. It wasn’t like drinking a collard green juice – eww.

Dinner Juice
Spinach (2 handfuls)
Carrot (1)
Celery (2 stalks)
Cabbage (2 leaves)
Apples (2)
Lime (1)
We’re getting low on varieties now. It’ll be pretty mundane for a couple of days with mostly similar juices.

Thank you for reading the blog.

Later,
K+